Let’s take stock a second.

No, scratch that. Let’s think about Pauly Shore. I mean, here was a guy who had it all, right? Don’t deny you loved the man – we all loved him, that’s why we turned on his annoying little career. He was a Golden Weasel God until he started making movies. That’s when we realized that there was only so much Shore you could take. I say you because I fucking well own Biodome on DVD, you bitches.

Still he went from the guy who could do no wrong to the one who could do no right.

A lot of careers go that way.

Which is why, upon deeper consideration, I will never do a movie with Tia Carrere. You’ll get the connection eventually. Maybe. I hope. Possibly?