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Save Walmart.com – These guys are great. Listen:

“God blessed Wal-Mart because Sam Walton chose to honor God and run his business according to biblical principles.

Then Something Happened!

American businesses across the nation are being blackmailed by the devil himself. They are being forced by the “politically correct” dogma (abortion, homosexuality, etc) of our day to accept his terms. If one chooses to defy this dogma, he will be forever branded as a right-wing, bigoted fascist, bent on forcing his own religion (Christianity) down everyone else’s throat. If the Church or any business will not accept these terms, or truly honors God, there will be hell to pay!

Now Satan has Wal-Mart in his line of fire!”

Do you hear that? Satan has Wal-Mart in his line of fire! Satan is a crack motherfuckin’ shot! Go, Satan, it’s your birthday!

Uhmm.. sorry. Anyway.

“After being lambasted for years by the anti-family, pro-abortion, pro-homosexual, radical environmental left, Wal-Mart has finally succumbed to this constant harassment and blackmail. She has now chosen a policy of appeasement to assuage all of the false accusations leveled against her in hopes that the devil will somehow stop being so mean. It is sad to say that Wal-Mart has joined The National Gay & Lesbian, Chamber of Commerce.

The NGCC called Wal-Mart’s action “part of the company’s ongoing commitment to advancing diversity (homosexuality) among all of its associate, supplier and customer bases.”

The NGCC desires that the world’s largest retailer would also become the world’s largest promoter of homosexual sodomy!

Wal-Mart desperately needs our help! There is something that we can do. It requires that we get out of the closet and run toward the roar!

WE MUST SAVE WAL-MART!”

Dude. They just said that this requires them to “get out of the closet”. I mean come on! Mind you this is run by the same fucks who run Operation Rescue and Operation Save America. So. It says something, don’t it?

Their plan? Gather on Black Friday and preach at people outside of Wal-Mart. Also? They write letters which get canned responses that they sometimes reply to. Them’s so smart.

So yeah. Get out there and uhm… save Wal-Ma… I can’t say it without laughing. Come out of the closet and help save Wal-Ma… *snicker* Awww fuck it. Go buy a toaster at Target.