Coworker: I miss Mario.
Me: The plumber?
Coworker: The video game.
Me: Right. Yes, Mario was awesome.
Coworker: I learned a lot playing Mario.
Me: I got kicked out of a zoo once for jumping on turtles.
Coworker: WHAT?!
Me: Well, Mario taught me…
Coworker: You’re kidding right?
Me: About Mario? Never. He jumped on turtles all the time.
Coworker: But… you… I… you DIDN’T REALLY! Did you?
Me: Well that’s why they kicked me out. Mario steered me wrong.
Coworker: You’re just kidding.
Me: Look at me. Consider this. Me. Would I, me, right here, jump on turtles to see if Mario was right?
Coworker: … Yeah. Maybe?
Me: But I didn’t.
Coworker: Right.
Me: Naw, man, shit you never know if they’re ninjas!
Coworker: Mario jumped on the Ninja Turtles?
Me: OH SNAP!
Coworker: Wow…
Me: Shredder is in another castle.
Eisner and Harvey award winning editor, writer and tired person. Novelist, comic writer, cat owner, NY'er.
