Horsepower

I keep hearing about horsepower. Horsepower. Now, this is a unit of measurement of power and as such has a number of very precise definitions (mechanical, electrical, boiler, hydraulic) as well as having metric, Imperial and Japanese definitions.

But let us be honest with each other. When you think of horsepower you don’t think of chunks of roughly 750 watts of power. No. You think of a horse wearing tights with a cape, stopping crime. And that special horse, SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power, lives inside your car and can replicate himself any number of times to make things go. Got yourself a 300hp engine? SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power has created 300 tiny versions of himself, each tasked with making your vehicle really move.

This is why larger, more powerful, engines make more noise. The horses. Those crazy horses. Powerful, crazy horses. And of course, SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power, is in all cars and engines at the same time. He’s universal that way. Like Jesus. Or Elvis (though unlike Elvis, while SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power is also everywhere, he is also in Michael J. Fox).

Billions of tiny versions of SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power exist in our world, each one racing against time to make things go a little bit faster. REMEMBER THAT!

Do not take SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power for granted. For one day, if we do, he could rise up against us. And then where would we be? Billions of tiny horses attacking and no vehicles able to move! Yeah. Scary, I know. So, please, respect SUPER HORSE – The Horse of Power and recognize all that he does for humanity.

Thank you.

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