Seeing as how it is Read an E-Book Week or some nonsense I decided, yesterday, to try an experiment. I went ahead and made an offer to the world. “Here, world,” I said, “you can get a copy of Strange Angel for free, in PDF, until Midnight EST. All you have to do is email me.”

Now, I admit freely, this was an experiment. I could have just linked the book for download from the post, but I wanted people to have to go that one extra step. I know I download stuff and never get to it. But if I have to do something for a file, I tend to read it way faster. But would people go for it? Would people bother to email an author they probably don’t know and ask for some book they haven’t heard of?

Remember, of course, I have three books out. None of them widely out, my publishers tend to be small, so far. But I ain’t new, is my point. And I was curious. I mean I know you can convert PDF to something a Kindle can read, but it is a bit of work. Doing it the way I did it leaves all sorts of issues and work for the reader. Well, yes, it was the only way I could do it just then and whatnot, but still. Interesting.

So how did it go?

Somewhere around 120 copies were requested. Which is about 115 more than I expected. A lot of that is thank to my wonderful friends who spread the word around, even to a Kindle board. Still. Let’s call it 120 (It was something like 117 but in my counting I know I lost a few for the count so I’m rounding) people that now have a copy of Strange Angel.

• Will any of them read it? Some, but probably not all.
• Will any of them review it on Amazon or a blog or talk about it? A tiny tiny slice might.
• Will any of them want to read something else by me? Well, who the fuck knows. But if they do, hey great.

I admit to being curious about all of those above questions. The answers I have right now are all standard amounts. That’s how this works. Will giving it away for free change those numbers? I want to find out.

Here is the greatest part, though, to me. I got 120 emails yesterday, and replied to each, sending them a file and a short note. Over 98% of those emails thanked me for offering the book, said I was awesome for doing it and were generally excited and polite and thankful. How cool is that?!

At least 30% of the people who got the book replied to my mail with the file to thank me a second time for, I guess, following through. Y’all are a bunch of polite motherfuckers! Cheers!

There was one guy though. I don’t know who he was… but he seemed to imply he read my blog. So maybe he’ll read this. But the note read as follows: “Good luck on being able to offer this in a dead tree edition or kindle-ish thingee at some point in the near future. For pay even.”

Now he didn’t mean anything by it. I know that. It wasn’t meant to be an insult. But first all of… wow. Let’s work backwards. “For pay even,” gleefully implies that I don’t get paid for my writing. Which, uhm, isn’t true. I don’t get paid enough for it to be a living, sure, but Shakespeare gots to get paid, son. And it’s an insulting line, ya know? To go up to a stranger and be like “Maybe some day you’ll be able to get paid for your skills, kid. *patpat*” But the rest of it, too. Man, Strange Angel’s been out since last year. In print. As a “dead tree edition.” I’m not saying I expect anyone to be aware of my tiny career, but if you read my blog maybe you would’ve noticed by now? Somehow? That I’m, whatchamacallit, a writer? Maybe not. Whatever. It just stuck out, you know?

But let’s not let that one guy spoil our beautiful moment together, chickadees. Come over here. No, leave your pants by the door. Where we were? Ah, right. The thing is that, overall, people are nifty. They’re thankful and polite and appreciate stuff. It makes sending 120 emails over the course of 6 hours a little easier.

So to wrap up, really, thank you, to each of you that partook of the offer. I hope you enjoy the book. If you like it, I have other books out you can also buy, if you want. Also, this has put ideas in my head. So expect other experiments in the future, and fun stuff.

Hey guys, the offer is closed. Sorry! But you can, of course, still buy the book at Amazon.

So it is read an e-book week or something. And so for today only, until Midnight EST, I make the following offer:

Anyone who emails me [adampknave @ gmail(dot)com] between now and midnight and asks for it, will get the PDF of the entire Strange Angel book. For frees, yo.

What is Strange Angel, you ask?

Susie Sparrow’s life has turned upside down. She’s merged with Ferapont, who says he is an angel, and has dedicated her life to ridding the world of demon possessed people. Unfortunately she is also in High School. Trying to schedule fights around school, hanging out with friends and dinner with the parents might be too much for one girl with large flaming wings to handle. But don’t tell her that. This volume collects all three volumes of the hit novella series as well as the original short story that started it all. As an added bonus it also contains a never before seen end story, exclusive to this volume!

“Strange Angel is fun, scary, gory, action packed, and surprisingly touching… This book is highly recommended for any fans of Buffy or just good, fun, dramatic horror and fantasy.” — D.J. Kirkbride, author of SOULLESS

“Knave’s intense vision is packed with occult thrills. His brutal meditations on the struggle between good and evil create a fast-paced narrative bristling with gothic horror appeal. This dark action series is bound to be popular with fans of the recent surge in horror film.” –John Edward Lawson, author of LAST BURN IN HELL

“And even though I have repeated this time and time again, Knave is one of my favorite writers. His style is intimate and provocative, quietly humorous and always intelligent. He has this amazing ability to make you question everything you believe in, while passing you a beer and telling you a dirty joke. And never was it showcased more then in this series. That’s right, people, Knave has fucking arrived!” -Kelly “Bloodymary” Perry, Horror-Web.com

“If you’ve been missing some Buffy, but want to read something with a unique twist, the Strange Angel series of novellas by Adam P. Knave is a great joyride.” – Adrienne Jones, author of BRINE

So once again it is simple. Email me [adampknave @ gmail(dot)com] and ask for the book and get a shiny PDF in the mail. I’d offer it in other formats if I had it in other formats, but, uhm, I don’t. So this is what I can. Still! Free book! Today only!

Hey guys, the offer is closed. Sorry! But you can, of course, still buy the book at Amazon.

So I have this problem. It’s an addiction, really.

Buying books.

I can’t help it. If I get money in, I instantly go gaze longingly at Amazon and wistfully pining for volumes I haven’t read yet. It’s awesome. It’s my crack, my booze, my heroin. Books, books, books. I want all the books in the world and time to read them. Twice. Three times, even. I can’t help it.

So I had an idea! There must be other people with this problem. So I should start a new foundation: Books Anonymous. A healing place for book addicts like myself. BA could help members other out and slowly conquer this crippling addiction to buying new books.

And the money I make from starting BA? I bet I could totally buy a lot of books with it.

A friend pointed out an auction to help Haiti. To Haiti With Love is a great collection of items you can bid on and help raise money. All proceeds go to help Broken Wings, which is the Canadian fundraising organization whose primary mission is to support the vision and ministry of the St. Joseph Family in Haiti, which includes the St. Joseph’s Home for Boys in Port-au Prince, Wings of Hope in Fermathe, and Trinity House in Jacmel.

Anyway! I wanted to help somehow but needed something worth putting up for auction. And then I remembered something cool. Back when Stays Crunchy in Milk came out the publisher produced exactly 34 hardcover copies. I stole one from him. I took number 1 of 34. I kept it separate and pondered what to do with it. I mean it becomes the single rarest copy of the book that will ever be made. Something cool had to be done with it.

Something cool was done with it. You can click that link and bid on the rarest copy of the book. You have until midnight, EST, Monday February 8th to get a bid in.

So go help some folks out and get the rarest of the rare. I knew I stole that copy for a reason. Once again, you can click here to go bid.

Thanks and please, spread the word.

Lots of stuff I missed. Woops.

Burrito Blade updated of course.

Things Wrong With Me has a two-parter go up this week with Episode 101 and Episode 102.

There was a new Interpretive Dunce this week, with A-HA’s Take On Me.

And for those of you who own one: You can now buy STAYS CRUNCHY IN MILK on the Kindle.

So let’s see then…

* Saw Holmes. Enjoyed the hell out of it.

* Burrito Blade Volume 2 begins today. You can read page 1 right here.

* I am now reading Twilight. Why? Well, I’ve read Anne Rice’s Jesus book, some Harry Potter, some Left Behind and a bit of Dan Brown. It isn’t that I enjoy crap writing, I truly don’t, but if I am going to dismiss something and say it is crap I feel I should at least know it for what it is. So I’ll read the first book. And then I’ll review it. Fairly. Started it last night. So far it’s crap. But hey, it could get better.

So here’s the deal. My publisher and I were discussing possible contests. We like contests. And one thing led to another and here we are with a copy of the Complete Farscape on DVD on its way. A copy we’re going to give away to one of you.

What’s Farscape?
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John Crichton. Astronaut. Flung through a wormhole and lost in a galaxy far from home. He finds himself in the middle of a prison break, surrounded by hostile aliens, soaring through space inside a glorious living space ship called Moya. Hunted by the relentless Peacekeepers, he allies himself with his unimaginably alien fellow refugees and searches for a way home.

So begins the epic sci-fi classic Farscape. A fusion of live action, state-of-the-art puppetry, prosthetics and CGI, Farscape features mind-boggling alien life forms, dazzling special effects, edge-of-your-seat thrills, irreverent humor and unforgettable characters — all brought to life by the creative minds at Jim Henson’s Creature Shop. No wonder it’s been called the most imaginative sci-fi series in television history.

Here, in time for the series’ tenth anniversary, are all four Farscape seasons, 88 episodes, together for the first time in one epic collection. These are the adventures of Moya’s crew — Crichton, Peacekeeper Aeryn Sun, warrior Ka D’Argo, azure priestess Zhaan, spritely thief Chiana, Dominar Rigel, Pilot and many others. Like Moya herself, this package contains amazing surprises including hours of bonus materials, making-of featurettes, commentaries, interviews, deleted scenes and much more. Prepare for Starburst!
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Here’s how to win it:

I have a book out, Stays Crunchy in Milk. It’s a pop culture road trip, a novel about friendship and growing up. A parable for 30yr olds. Here’s the blurb for the book:
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They were four: Wereberry the strawberry werewolf, Choco-Ra the chocolate mummy, The Creature From the Fruit Lagoon (his friends call him “T.C.”), and Cherrygeist the… well she was a ghost. At least, until she wasn’t. One day, she wasn’t there at all. And then they were three.

Three friends who have sworn to search for her to the ends of the world and beyond – to find and save her.

Through familiar lands to places startling and unknown – across looming castles, endless battlefields and simple brick roads – these three friends will hunt and search and scour every inch. Along the way they’ll have to rely on a whole lot of luck and a little bit of charm, but mostly each other.

A fairy tale for the super-sugar generation, Stays Crunchy in Milk is a road novel packed with 100% of your recommended daily allowance of essential action and adventure. And it’s a delicious part of a nutritious breakfast.
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Here’s what you need to do, now, to get this ball rolling. Follow this link to the book and buy a copy. Take a picture of yourself with the book. Leave the picture, or a link to the picture, as a comment to this entry.

On December 18th we will randomly pick one person and then we will mail out a copy of The Complete Farscape to them! That’s it. Buy a book, take a picture, win a set of DVDs.

And now some fine print: Make sure the email field in your comment is correct, because we will need it to contact you if you win. We will not keep your email address or use it for anything other than winner notification. This whole shebang is only open to residents of the U.S. and Canada, the DVDs will be Region 1 encoded, keep in mind. Henson and A&E have nothing do to with this madness. This contest is sponsored by Creative Guy Press.

EDIT: Contest closed. Ed Hickox has won. Thanks for playing.

Not really sure what to write here, on this topic, so this will be first draft thoughts in process stuff. Just remember that going in. I’ve been thinking about getting an ebook reader again. I say again because back in the day (1999?) I owned a Rocket E-Book and loved it. But that was then and this is now.

The Kindle doesn’t do it for me, much. It’s too tied down. It’s a pain in the ass to get non-Kindle files on it. Not a fan of the form or the overall function. But the B&N Nook intrigues me.

See, for my life, putting ebooks on the reader is only part of the idea. I mean I could, theoretically, read on my iPhone (bleh?) or whatever. But the Nook (Lord that name sucks) is expandable and natively handles PDF. It also (like everything else) allows for note taking and highlighting. And see now my interest picks up. Yes it reads non-DRM ePub files (and in fact the B&N stores uses a DRM’d ePub format) and PDF and has instant access to Project Gutenberg. Which is seventeen shades of awesome.

But it might let me edit novels on it. I mean, theoretically. It would be clumsier than doing it by hand on a page, in a lot of ways. Making a note to correct a minor thing like a typo (or I guess just highlight it?) takes longer to read than and put in that it does from paper. You have to spend battery life while you’re inputting changes. Page numbers don’t line up since page numbers on an ebook reader are variable due to text sizes and such.

So really it isn’t there yet. And until all my more re-read books are easily available in electronic format (they aren’t right now, none of the ones I count on the top tier of that list are) and until easy editing comes to the device … yeah it ain’t there.

And sure there are other devices I can read books on and other formats and half a hundred things I could do for ebooks. Here’s the truth. I don’t give a fuck. I am not really a fan of reading books outside of them being books. For utter convenience of having certain things always with me, and for not hauling around 2 inch stacks of paper – I would adjust. In general? Fuck that. I like books. So yeah, I don’t care. I am not going out of my way to be able to read books electronically. They must come to me, in the way I want. I am not negotiating with them, see?

But yeah, just some thoughts about the future.

First off: Christian Dumais takes time away from writing awesome short stories and reviews Stays Crunchy in Milk at his site. Tomorrow there will be an interview.

He says “Stays Crunchy in Milk is one of the year’s best literary surprises.” See that? I’m a surprise and literary! Wait. What? Hmm. Does that mean I leapt out of a big cake made of Joyce? Who knows! But go read the review and then buy the book. It makes a great holiday gift.

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I have a friend who lives in a small town. I mean small. Like tiny. Like small small town. And I got this email, from said friend: “Did you know if you use the words “Egregious Civil Rights Violation” in a town board meeting, you’ll get a call from the town attorney that very night?”

My gut reaction was typed into my reply. I couldn’t stop myself: “Did he try to ban dancing? Do they do that in small towns? I’ve seen Foot Loose, I know how these things work!”

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More later.

Don’t forget that you can buy a copy of Stays Crunchy in Milk! You should at least consider it. And hey, if you have bought it, thank you! To you I ask if you have considered adding a review to Amazon for the book. Every bit helps. Thanks!

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One of the things you learn quickly is that books only work if people read them. Pimping is a constant thing, and word of mouth above all else can make or break a book. Which is really funky for me because while I know it I am bad about it.

I like putting things out there and stepping back. That’s, by the way, bad. But it is my reflex, to get out of the work’s way. It just means the work lays there a bit more than I might like. And frankly that can be dangerous. Because the more things lay there the less the next thing does well and so on.

So I have to start building ways to build word of mouth more often.

I got this whole internet though. And a lot of friends. So yeah I ask for your help. Spread the word some. Let me know how I can help you spread the word and what you think would make the book sell more. Publisher can’t cut the price. He is going to release a kindle version for as cheap as we can, there will prolly not be another ebook version outside of the kindle. Possibly a DRM-free PDF version. Maybe. There is a 70-odd page section of the book for free download right now. Over 1000 people have downloaded it! It hasn’t helped sales.

Now that may be because the book sucks. It is possible. It may be because people download it and then read it and then don’t bother buying the book, or plan to and will later or a million other things. But without an uptick in sales it is hard to judge, really.

But ideas are welcome and asked for.