Archive for nsfw

Betty White – naked

Well that’s not what I expected to get in the mail today. It seems ages ago that Betty White did some nude modeling. You know where this is going, don’t you? Of course you do. So Yeeeah.com posted the pics and here they are for you. If you wanted to see some black and white pics of a nude, young, Betty White…
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Kanye West’s Penis, with obligatory joke.

As a lot of you know, Kanye West used to send pictures of his dick to people on MySpace. At least one of those pictures has escaped into the wild, of course, and so, here it is under the cut:
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When bad fic happens to snarky people.

So almost eight years ago now, Rose and I sat around and were IM’ing when suddenly there came, upon the horizon, really crappy Voltron fic. And we tore it apart. So presented here is the whole transcript of that meeting of the brains. It’s kinda longish, and has language that is very NSFW. It’s also all unedited and stuff, so typos and lack of punctuation and capital letters can happen. But it is also one of the funniest things I’ve ever been a part of. So enjoy it. We still do.

APK: Voltron LemonFic

APK: Really badly written *sigh*

APK: “He met her passion-clouded gaze” ok this is right out.

Rose: ROFL!

Rose: But is it porn?

APK: It’s Lemon…

APK: So not hardcore

Rose: okay, it’s bad when the author’s name makes you crack up

Rose: before you even get to the fic

APK: from a different one “Service? That was the service she meant? Lotor struggled against the restraints, knowing it was futile.”

APK: Merla? you find Merla, Queen of Darkness amusing?

APK: sounds like she’s the smiting type

Rose: oh, for heaven’s sake

APK: Voltron fans apparently don’t care that much

Rose: “He covered her impassioned gasps with his mouth coaxing her towards the edge of a precipice she didn’t understand but was eagerly driving herself towards.”

APK: BWAHHAHAHAHA

Rose: i don’t care if it hurts _her_, this is hurting _me_
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Legend of Neil teaser featuring Felicia Day.

Everyone is posting the Guild’s new video. And it is awesome. But how many of you know Felicia Day has been in Legend of Neil on and off as the horny fairy? And that there is an upcoming musical episode of the show? And that … well … here’s the teaser video. For those of you that want to hear Felicia Day sing about Donkey Punches. A big ol’ duh – yes language that is NSFW.

This is all you get.

Today you get a link right here to Marisa Tomei topless. NSFW, obviously.

That’s it for now, on hellblazer. No time for content, Doctor Jones. But there is always time for topless Marisa Tomei.

The Monday recap – and some porn

So Monday night happened, the way it will. Quiet night, mostly. Mostly a bunch of us traded cat stories, like you do, and drank and hung out. I played spotter, as is my job. You know, when M is talking to folks at one corner of the bar she has her back to the rest of the place and I can still see it, so it becomes my job to go “M, you’re being paged.”

It’s a job.

Then later M rubbed her hands together with glee and gave a small evil laugh. “I’m planning some evil,” she said.

I looked concerned. “Wait, you’re going to plan evil without me?”

“Well, it isn’t really evil, no I wouldn’t plan EVIL without you.”

“Thanks,” I said and turned to Hammerpants, “You know I call shotgun on Satan.”

Later still I stood up to head down to the bathroom and my bag strap fell off my knee, twisted partly around the chair and looped over my foot. So I almost went headfirst into the floor, for about a second, which made M and Hammerpants wonder how much I had to drink. Really, it was the strap.

While downstairs I passes these two guys discussing guitarists.

“You know who has a little Hendrix in him?” the first guy asked.

“No, who?”

“Prince.”

“Fair enough.”

I had to leave quickly before I stopped to point out that Prince could only FIT a little bit of Hendrix in him. I mean Hendrix was kinda tall. Prince is the opposite of that.

So yeah, quiet night.

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The preview should be safe enough for work. Don’t hit play though unless you want to see Smurf Porn. Yes, people painted blue, in little white outfits, smurfing like there’s no tomorrow. They smurf and smurf and you won’t believe your eyes when they start to smurf. Did I mention it was in Spanish? Live action smurf porn in Spanish. Yup.

Guns for sale.

First up is the Avurt IM-5 Launcher. It’s a non-lethal device, tossing out semi-auto rounds up to 40 feet.

The rounds themselves use PAVA powder, apparently a variant on pepper spray.

More importantly it comes in blue, black red and pink. Because your $300 future-pepper-spray-gun thing should damn well accessorize properly.

The Afternooner

All right children. Question and answer time. I ask the questions! You give the answers! These are both going to be fairly sexual in nature so consider yourselves warned. Or don’t. Just close your eyes and drop your pants and everything will be just fine. You trust me, don’t you? What? No, that isn’t the sound of a rubber glove you just heard. Ignore it. Just focus on the questions.

Question One: How much would you charge if someone wanted to make a Real Doll of you? They wouldn’t be there when the casting was done but the doll would be a replica of you to the pore. Exactly, or as close as Real Dolls can get, like you in face and body. What would it take to get you to say yes to that?

Question Two: This question needs some back story! I heard a story today from a friend of mine about someone who masturbated in his office. He really couldn’t wait to get home or go to a bathroom and so he ended up pulling up the edge of his chair mat and jerking off against it. Now, as fucked up as that human is, he is not the question. The question is simple. What piece of office furniture would you fuck first, if you had to fuck one? Men? Women? Rubbing ff on a file cabinet? Going to town with your Red Swingline? Mouse up your ass? Dear lord don’t stick your dick in the shredder!

Paenis.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you… Harry Potter and the Exposed Cock. I won’t post the image here, because hey not exactly work safe, ya dig? Daniel Radcliffe, fully nude, standing in front of that horse.

Wanna see his wand?(Remember – NSFW)

So there ya go. Ron is off somewhere crying. Hermione is… well after seeing this pic she was… well her expression and gut reaction say it all:


So there you have it. a little male full frontal nudity to start your Friday. Don’t say I never did nothing for you.

Edit: This may be a photoshop job. His mother IS jewish after all and it looks a bit odd. So decide for yourself.

Pauly

Pauly Shore gets heckled. And then he gets fucking DECKED. Sound is NSFW and contains much with the cursing. But uhhh…

The Wea-SEL got PU-UNCHED.

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EDIT: It was faked. Which makes sense. But ah well.