Welcome to Adam P. Knave dot com

Adam P. Knave is a freelance writer and editor who has written fiction (CRAZY LITTLE THINGS and STRANGE ANGEL, STAYS CRUNCHY IN MILK), comics (LEGEND OF THE BURRITO BLADE and THINGS WRONG WITH ME and stories appearing in Image's POPGUN anthology) and columns for sites such as thefoonote, TwoHeadedCat and PopCultureShock. He is also one of the editors of Image's POPGUN anthology as well as other comic projects.


Farscape – Back on DVD in Nov. – Press Release details!

Filed Under (tv) by APK on 01-07-2009

So maybe some of you noticed – Farscape vanished on DVD recently. ADV lost the license to produce the DVDs (Lion’s Gate has the license for Peacekeeper War and that stays) so the DVDs vanished and had no home. It’s also the shows 10th anniversary this year. It’s been a while and it is hard as hell to introduce someone to the show since you can’t buy it. Netflix was in the middle of replacing their older DVDs when it happened so I think they now have seasons 2-3 but not 1 or 4. Which is not helpful. Anyway! Henson released a press release today that contained the following:

“Blasting off in November 2009, as the show marks its 10th Anniversary, the treasure of the newly re-packaged DVD line will feature a Farscape home entertainment first: THE COMPLETE SERIES MEGASET. Never before available in one package, A&E Home Entertainment brings together all four out-of-this-world seasons with countless hours of absorbing bonus programming featuring multiple commentaries, interviews with cast and crew, behind-the-scenes featurettes and much more! Single season collector’s sets will also be released, offering genre fans of all walks the opportunity to sample this superlative sci-fi classic.”

So there you go. November. A complete series set and new season sets. No word on pricing or new features, or how many of the old features are kept (my guess on the last is almost all and certainly all the commentaries). More as I get it.

Mr. Rogers breakdancing

Filed Under (YouTubed, tv) by APK on 12-06-2009

Mr. Rogers learns some breakdacin’ moves.

Zach Attack.

Filed Under (celeb, tv) by APK on 10-06-2009

For years now, Mark-Paul Gosselaar has tried to put his time on Saved by the Bell behind him. He went on to other shows, winced if someone asked him about being Zach Morris and generally had the same growing pains a lot of actors do when they are trying to shed their old skins and grow.

I think maybe he’s hit the same point NPH did a while back and has decided to embrace his life now. Here he is on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Except he didn’t come on the show as Mark-Paul Gosselaar. No. He did it as Zach Morris. Seriously.

Star Wars/TV show opening mashups.

Filed Under (YouTubed, mash-ups, movies, tv) by APK on 05-06-2009

A lot of people have been posting this, so here you go: Han Solo, P.I. for all you old Magnum fans:

“But we want more,” you tell me, “not just that one!” And so I oblige with:

MacGuyver/Star Wars

A-Team/Star Wars

CHiPs/Star Wars

Take THAT, Magic!

Filed Under (tv) by APK on 04-06-2009

Who doesn’t love magic AND NPH?

Thundercats, ho.

Filed Under (humor, tv) by APK on 18-05-2009

Been thinking about the Thundercats. Well, all right, last night while in bed, drifting off to sleep I had a few thoughts about the Thundercats. That happens, more often than I care to admit. I’ll be there, trying to sleep, when suddenly a bit of strange pop culture crap will occur to me and I will be forced to lay there – wide awake for another hour – and think about it.

Then I bring it to you. That’s the deal.

So the Thundercats. Their planet dies and so they get a fleet together (A ThunderFleet, ‘natch) and leave for “This Third Earth.” Which implies that they live on the second, doesn’t it? They might call it Thundera but where are these other two Earths? Sneaky bitches.

Anyway, they go and the bad mutants of … this hurts … Plun-Darr destroy the fleet, except for like … one ship? And that one ship has seven of their race (one who dies kinda instantly if I remember right, poor Jaga) and one strange creature by the name of Snarf.

That’s it. Their entire race is wiped out except for six guys who have one grown female and one teenage female and … well they’re pretty much fucked, aren’t they? And yes later on they meet three other Thundercats who survived, bringing their total genetic pool to a total of nine people (and one Snarf-thing). I can tell you how the last episode goes:

They die the fuck out.

I mean that’s it. They fight the good fight, taking on the evil mummy and eventually defeat him. They bring some short-lived peace to their adopted home. They rule the planet. Then, one by one, they get old and die. Maybe a new Thundercat is born, here or there, but rather damn quickly they’re gone.

The show really couldn’t have gone on too many season, could it? Lion-o’s Prostate Problem isn’t a great episode.

Snarf, by the way, is a member of a servant race of the Thundercats. No shit. Wikipedia notes: “Snarfs are the only creatures in the universe incapable of evil” and I have to wonder about that. If you looked like a version of Alf that someone sculpted out of wet putty how much evil could you commit? Little lumpy dude was too small, immobile and, frankly, stupid, to do much harm. Incapable of evil. No. Shit. Since Snarf was a snarf were his people snarves? Whatever.

Still, let’s talk about the Thundercats fearless leader for a second. He had a sword. The Sword of Omens, in fact. Why was it called that? It wasn’t ominous. It wasn’t an omen. Even if you stretch and go “Seeing it was an omen for his enemies that …” oh shut the fuck up. He had a sword.

Now this sword was kinda special. It started off dagger sized. It fit inside this big gauntlet thing he wore and then he would whip it out (cutting the holy fuck out of his forearm, each and every time I think) and would then menace the world with … a dagger.

Of Omens.

No, this thing would grow to full sword size. Now that might sound badass to some of you. “Look,” you’re saying, “it’s a dagger and a sword and it grows so you can conceal it and…” and I tell you to hold up and wait for the punch line.

It only grew when Lion-o shouted “Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats! Hoooooooooo!” really loudly. It would then also throw a fucking batsignal into the sky. Yes. He would yell, the sword would grow, kinda slowly, and then shine a big fucking spotlight with the Thundercats logo into the sky. Each of his people’s eyes would glow and they would come find him.

Ok. Sure.

So it grew to full size slowly, needed him to stop and shout shit and also always cast a big light. Yeah, this is my weapon of choice. No, really. Could it be more useless? “Hold on, big bad mutant-guy-thing! I just have to shout and then wait while this … you know what, fuck it, lemme take one of those laser rifles you carry and just shoot you in the fucking face with it!” Never mind, what if Lion-o needs the sword for something innocent?

He has to cut down a tree. A dagger won’t do it. “Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats! Hoooooooooo!” All his friends come running, a searchlight brightens the sky, everything goes off at once. Bitch wanted some logs for the fire. This didn’t need a team effort. But that sword, man, it don’t do subtle, a’ight?

And what about back on ol’ Thundera? When there were millions of these fools running around? The sword seems to make everyone’s eyes glow. Can you imagine how pissed off you would get if every time the King went out to hunt and was about to kill a motherfuckin’ duck your eyes lit up, the sky darkened, spotlights cast across the sky and you had this urge to run to his side, interrupting whatever you were doing?

You know what I would’ve done?

I would’ve told the King that the planet was going to explode, got him and a few friends on a ship, hired some dudes to attack them and make them think everyone else got killed and be done with them!

I’m just saying. Thundera? Perfectly fine. Probably a moon of Krypton (talk about the greatest April Fools joke ever. Oh, man, you shoulda seen Jor-El’s face when they were all “Hahahaha and then you sent your kid in a rocket!” Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!) or something. Still. Thundercats. Buncha hos.

Mentos!

Filed Under (NY Life, YouTubed, mash-ups, tv) by APK on 14-05-2009

I wanna say how this has been a crazy week but I realize I only have crazy weeks now so it isn’t anything special, I suppose. I dunno. There are big things coming, huge ones possibly, and I can’t discuss any of them yet. So I sit here and think of things I want to say and share and reveal and instead I just do some work and move along.

But soon. I mean Crunchy comes out in less than 100 days That’s nuts. I mean that’s so soon and crazy and scary and exciting. Sheesh.

But if I focus on that I’ll really lose my mind. So instead I give you this:

MY LITTLE PONY: Reign of Buttercup Sprinkles.

Filed Under (YouTubed, humor, movies, tv) by APK on 07-05-2009

Yes, the My Little Pony live action movie trailer. It’s … uhm … ok I’d go see it.

Take a look…

Filed Under (mash-ups, tv) by APK on 28-04-2009

(found via charmed1ofdoom)

In which I am obsessed with, and look back on, Turbo Teen.

Filed Under (YouTubed, awesome!, humor, tv, wtf?!) by APK on 24-04-2009

I come today not to praise Turbo Teen but to simply question him. Do you remember Turbo Teen? It’s one of those cartoons I loved as a kid and then locked away and nearly forgot. Oh, sure, I would remember bits and dribbles of it from time to time but I would blank on the name and go back to fondly recalling Mr. T and the T-Force (They had a bulldog! With a mohawk!) instead.

So yeah, Turbo Teen spent a while lost in the swirl of memories that happens to people when they cram their heads too full of pop culture nerdism. Some people drop the name of the woman who worked with Thundarr the Barbarian (Ariel) and some drop Turbo Teen.

But in thinking back about Turbo Teen I grow oddly disturbed by it. And I want to explore why. Come with me, won’t you?

Turbo Teen was a kid named Brett Matthews. He was driving along one night in the rain and swerved off the road right into a secret government lab! Don’t you hate it when that shit happens? I swear, every time I take a wrong turn in the night I’m in a government lab or alien base or your mom’s place. It’s crazy!

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